Tuesday, 27 February 2007

Oh Jesus, It´s Bono

Director Steven Spielberg, in a press conference this weekend, announced he had discovered the tombs of Bono and The Edge, the prehistoric musical group, whose existence has been often debated.

The director of "ET" said "It doesn't get bigger than this".
The revelations come in a documentary the film maker has produced for Cartoon Network, rapidly becoming the most respected news source in the American media. In the documentary, experts reveal that DNA testing has proved that Bono and The Edge were married, and had children.
"Over 2000 years ago, Bono and The Edge were buried here in Jerusalem, and became the foundations of Western civilisation. Our discoveries should revolutionise thinking about who gave rock and roll to us", the ageing Director claimed.

Music critics have argued Spielberg is wrong, and that despite widespread belief of Bono´s existence 2000 years ago, his group were actually making music as recently as 2004. However, Spielberg pointed out "they (the critics) have no DNA evidence for Bono´s existence after the year 0."

This discovery comes hot on the tails of the coins found recently in northern Britain, which seem show popular Ancient Singer "Madonna" in a new light. Contrary to common belief that Madonna was extremely beautiful, the image on the coin is very different. Another coin, showing her lover, Britney Spears, was similarly unflattering.

Madonna, left, with her lover B.Spears, right.

No comments: