Tuesday, 24 February 2009

Modern Drugs are Rubbish

"The emphasis is on the thrill of the moment, the buzz of rescuing the princess in the game. No care is given for the princess herself, for the content or for any long-term significance, because there is none."

- Once you've felt the buzz of rescuing the princess it's like there's nothing else, man, you just wanna rescue the princess over and over again. Soon, I was stealing and begging on the street, just so I could rescue the princess and feel that high again. -

...Lady Greenfield continues her intelligent analysis of modern technological stuff by saying, 'perhaps the next generation will define themselves by the responses of others.'
Now, that would be a change, wouldn't it? Because, as social creatures humans have absolutely never defined themselves by the responses of others, have they? Oh, no, ha. Wait a minute, they almost entirely have. I know some of us like to try not to, too much, but that's not the point. What is Lady Greenfield on about?

I'm off to inject some Facebook and smoke a Twitter

Wednesday, 11 February 2009

yeah, hip daddy cool

I don't know much about Seth Reznik, except what I read in his Guardian bio. So, I know as well as writing digital zeitgeisty piffle occasionally, he used to work for an organisation called "Americans Coming Together", which is a liberal activist group. Yeah, right. Sounds a bit TOO liberal for me, and I really don't see why Americans should have to do that together at all.
Hilarity aside, Seth writes a piece about how Obama has called on a Huffington Post (or HuffPoo, as people call it) journalist, and how this really shows how blogs are changing the landscape.
"Politicians – and the media – can no longer rely on the media to define what is important. A whole range of actors now decide, not least the consumers of news themselves. The command and control grid of media management is out. Authenticity is in."
Authenticity WHAT? Huffpoo is just a bunch of journalists writing boring crap - what could be more media than that? The website looks pretty media-y to me. In terms of a media revolution, it's a bit like saying "hey, we're gonna fight a war, but we're going to use GUNS".
What is it with authenticity anyway? I'm lost! So, Because this is a blog, is what I'm writing more real? Is it gooder because I can just make up whatever I want without the interference of anyone professional or anyone to sheck my typling? Because libel means nothing here, I can be realer than real - it's my truth and I'll tell it if I want to, even if it's wrong, even if it's idiotic. It's my truth, it's the realierest, truthiest thing in the world. Paris Hilton has four bottoms! There I said it. Really real. Authen-fucking-ticity city here we come, baby.

I created this show!

Noel "Mr sweaters" Edmonds has gone on an amusing rant against some council that won't let an injured war veteran build whatever bungalow he wants wherever he wants BECAUSE HE'S A VETERAN. Y'know? We have to respect our war veterans by LETTING THEM DO WHATEVER THE FUCK THEY WANT. Especially if they don't have legs, then we should respect them more, and actively help them do do whatever they want because they were in a war, and did I mention they have no legs? Here's that video.
And that video led me to this one:
I didn't watch it all (I'm not insane), but really enjoyed the idea that if you've got any bassoons or 'cellos, send them in to this charity...
Why did someone let silly gameshow host Noel Edmonds do a telly box programme where he can shout his gob hole off about issues he, as a silly gameshow host, know's frankly fuck all about? I need a right wing knee-jerk reaction coated with a bloated sense of self importance! Quick, get Noel on the phone and tell him the council's planning to round up and shoot war veterans while dancing on the Queen mum's grave! What do you say Noel?

Sunday, 1 February 2009

late night hype


Discoproportionality


The Israeli Prime Minister, Ek Ekekekek, wants the world to know that if you're a dick and try to attack Israel, he will be a disproportionately large dick in response. Recent actions prove he and his government are certainly some of the biggest dicks on the planet.

Don't get confused and think I'm trying to say Israeli politicians are hung like donkeys - what I'm saying is "look at them, what a bunch of massive cocks".

I might try to remember Ek Ekekekekek's name properly when he stops acting in such a toweringly phallic way. I'm not even sure why he feels the need to tell the world something we already know - that he's a cock - and it would be much more instructive for us were he to tell us why he's such a dick.

Maybe he gets sexually aroused by the idea of 'accidentally' bombing hospitals?

I don't know, but considering how much of a dick he is I can only assume the worst.